Friday, December 28, 2007

On Used Books and Travel Diaries (Part I)

I was reading Mark Helprin’s brilliant “Winter’s Tale” when a small slip fell from the book. It was a plane boarding pass for a flight from Manchester – UK, to Philadelphia – USA. A warm feeling came over me, and I smiled. This is one of the reasons I absolutely love used books and especially love buying them when I’m traveling. I had bought “Winter’s Tale” from a used book store in Philly last June. And so I started thinking of the journey the book made from Manchester to Philly before its last reader sold it.

In August of 2006, I was in Muenster/Germany, and we made a quick trip across the border into the Netherlands, stopping in one tiny village. We were told it’s known for being a “Book Village” (I can’t for the life of me remember its actual name). Everything about it was tiny, except perhaps the windmills, and the number of small family-owned used book stores. Most book stores were part of some house - practically the family library compiled over the years and opened to the public. The one I entered had a small wooden door that opened to the kitchen, where a dog stood barking and an old woman was baking. The great thing about the Dutch is that they, unlike the German and French, take pride in their fluency in other languages. I bought about eight English and French books for only 20 Euros.









A few months later I visited Istanbul – and although I was there for only two days, I fell head over heels in love with that magical city. It’s so hard to explain what’s so captivating about Istanbul. I promised to blog about it last year but never did. Yesterday, I had a very interesting conversation with someone who has been living there, and after discussing the great contradictions of the city, Turkish nationalism, cultural identity crisis, visual richness, the Bosphorous, and the mystical air of all the elements the city brings together, I found myself deeply longing for Istanbul.






I had started reading Orhan Pamuk’s Istanbul before that trip, and the one thing that had stuck in my mind from the early chapters of the book was the Bosphorous. So once I dropped my luggage in the hotel room, I asked the guy at the reception where I could have a nice cup of coffee at some café overlooking the water. Without hesitation, he gave me a map and said “Ortakoy”. He said “take a bus that says ‘Besiktas’,” and I walked out from the hotel door into Taksim square, ready to take on the city and myself… no time constraints for the day, and no tourist guidebook must-sees in mind.

I walked and walked, stopping to stare at old abandoned Ottoman style buildings and to take in the surroundings. I walked past the Galata Saray Stadium before taking some random bus. No one spoke any English, so I ended up communicating with the driver in sign language before he dropped me off somewhere and kept blabbering in Turkish and pointing to the other side of the street. I found out later that I was in fact at Sultan Ahmet. I stood in the big square in front of the New Mosque watching the pigeons before venturing on, only to find myself at the Grand Bazaar.









The walk continued, but I can’t remember exact details of the path I took, or the busses I got on and off. I stopped to buy chestnuts on the street, eat some strange sea-food, and listen to some kid play the Accordion.



As the sun started setting I was at Besiktas, which turned out to be a street full of universities and colleges, and it was quite interesting to see all the students stepping out and walking down the street. While the area around Sultan Ahmet had resemblances to downtown Amman, at least in the way the people looked and the expressions on the faces of the old men and women, Besiktas looked very European, young people looking trendy, and couples holding hands and displaying affection without any reservations.



Since it was around the 10th of November, Turkey was commemorating its modern father, Ataturk, and there was some street exhibit about him.



I finally made it to Ortakoy, and the Mosque stood majestically by the Bosphorous, its lights glowing against the dark sky. The area was full of cafes and shops, and little stands of used books. I loved it, and I dug in looking for books on modern Turkish literature.





During the walk back to Taksim, I bought myself a small guide book and decided that since I only had one day left, it might not be a bad idea to have it roughly planned.


Lest this post turn into novel-length proportions, I will only mention one other part of my Istanbul explorations; the hunt for Cukurcuma. My guidebook said that it’s a small antique shop and artist gallery. It turned out to be in an area full of antique shops with all kinds of random objects from the Ottoman era scattered haphazardly. One place belonged to some artist (he had some guests at the store and they were engaged in a lively discussion over some painting. It was one of those (many) moments I wished I could understand Turkish). Amidst his collection lay a pile of old manuscripts and books, and the only thing I could afford was a tiny French dictionary in a beautiful brown leather jacket.



At that, I’ll go make myself a cup of coffee and enjoy my Friday afternoon reading. This Christmas Santa got me a coffee percolator, a book of William Blake poetry, and Aldous Huxley’s “The Doors of Perception”. I take it I was a good girl this year :)



Monday, December 24, 2007

Let's Talk Law

It’s becoming old news; another newborn was found in a pool of her blood, in the WC of Al Basheer Hospital. Apparently her mother came to the hospital seeking pain killers for cramps. Doctors suspected she was pregnant and she denied it, so they asked her to take a urine test. She went to the toilets, delivered the baby, cut the umbilical cord with some sharp device, left the baby there, and escaped.

The baby is recovering in hospital before being handed over to the Ministry of Social Development. The 24-year-old mother was found an hour after the baby was discovered, and she admitted that she was pregnant out of wedlock. The newspaper report says she is now being hospitalized for excessive blood loss, and will be later handed over to police for further investigation.

It is obvious why that young woman would want to get rid of the baby and hide what had happened. Some people comment on such news and say “how could a mother be so cold-hearted and throw away her baby?”, but the law does not allow an unmarried mother to keep the baby anyway, and the family and society do not provide any support network or backup in such cases. On the contrary, this woman probably fears for her life. This is a survival tactic. Anyways, I didn’t start this post to talk about crimes in the name of so-called-honor.

Social pressure and fear of family “honor cleansing mechanisms” aside, this news got me wondering about the nature of the “police investigation” and whether that young woman should fear being punished by the law. In the first case that took place in September, we read that the parents of the newborn that was found in some trash bin were facing charges of adultery (rather than attempted murder, read Naseem’s post here). I used to know that adultery is a crime in Jordanian Law, but then lately I’ve been hearing conflicting views on it. So I decided to check for myself. Did you know that every single Jordanian Law, whether temporary or approved by parliament, and whether active or not, is available online (click here).

I spent a good two hours reading different legislations just out of curiosity, the Personal Status Law, the Juvenile Law, the Civil Law, and – what I was looking for - the Criminal Law. Legal terminology is sometimes complicated and there were moments where I felt I was reading Chinese. But I did find some interesting and intriguing stuff.

So… the verdict: Article 282 of the Criminal Law states that the man and woman who commit adultery together by consent are punished by one to three years of prison. The sentence is no less than two years if either one of them is married.

Then you have article 284, which states:


لايجـوز ملاحقة الزاني او الزانية الا بشكوى الزوج او الزوجة ، مادامت الزوجية قائمة بينهما ، وكذلك بشكوى ولي الزانية ، وفي حال الشكوى ضد احدهما او كليهما يلاحـق الاثنان معاً بالاضافة الى الشريك والمحرض والمتدخل في فعل الزنا ان وجدوا، وتسقط الشكوى والعقوبة بالاسقاط.

… which roughly means that adulterers cannot be persecuted unless a complaint is filed against one or both of them by their spouse (as long as the marriage is still valid), or by the woman’s custodian (or guardian, whatever the translation is for “waliyy”), which means her father or whoever is in his place (grandfather, brother, uncle…).

A complaint cannot be filed against only one of the partners in adultery; it’s either the two of them, or no one is persecuted.

I wonder how many times it actually happened for a woman’s father to file a complaint and press adultery charges against his daughter and her partner, rather than, say, have them both shot, by an underage son preferably. Just curious. But then again, it is the law itself that has loopholes to allow people to take the law into their own hands. If a young man knew he would spend a lifetime in prison for killing his sister, would he still do it?

Did I say I don’t want to talk about killing in the name of honor?? Well… I guess I couldn’t help it. It really is not about the 20 murders that take place every year, it’s about society burying its head in the sand about certain ‘taboo’ issues and not wanting to have a civilized and open debate about them so that babies in trash bins and sewage pipes and hospital toilets don’t become habitual news for us. I remember a few years ago at the University of Jordan, there was an awareness campaign on AIDS, and most students were passing by the posters and going like "efft, this is an issue alien to our society, can't they waste campaign resources on something more relevant?" It's that kind of denial our society wraps itself with, but alarm bells are ringing!

On a brighter note (for myself at least), I guess I’m back from my blogging hiatus :) happy belated Eid and Merry Christmas to those of you celebrating, and to those of you who aren't, I hope you're enjoying the season anyway.


Saturday, December 08, 2007

Rediscovering Language - and Going Anonymous

It’s 4:00 am. I’m nibbling on wara2 dawali leftovers (stuffed vine leaves), and listening to Sylvain Luc. I’ve been awake since 2:30 am, and instead of falling back asleep, I sat in bed writing mental blog posts. And then I decided that I should just get up and start that Arabic-language blog I’ve been planning to start for over two years now.

The issue has been constantly on my mind. Why is it that when I write in English, words flow faster and I find a million ways to express myself, whereas when I attempt to write in Arabic, I can produce properly-structured sentences but it all sounds so fake and distant, and I never seem to find the exact words that reflect what I’m trying to say??

I didn’t go to a school that taught all subjects in English. I did not live abroad or study abroad. I went to a very traditional private school in Amman, where I learned good English but also good Arabic, and where I used to do my friends’ and sisters’ writing assignments for them most of the time. Afterwards I studied at the University of Jordan, and for one year I even wrote for the official Arabic-language student newspaper. So when did I fall out of practice? When did writing in Arabic start feeling alien? Why does it sound detached and even theatrical??

Over the past couple of years, I’ve been reading books in Arabic besides all the things I read in English. It’s been wonderful discovering some gems in modern Jordanian and Arabic. But reading is not enough.

This week I wrote a concert review for the new Arabic weekly “Assijil”. It turned out fine. The editor did not change or fix anything. But when I re-read it, I felt weird. And I knew that I can’t procrastinate any longer - I have to start practicing seriously. And what better than a blog to experiment with language and document the journey :)

Don’t hold your breath; I’m not linking to it. If I’m going to rediscover language and find my voice in writing, then the least I can do is be free of the self-censorship burden.

______________________________________________________________

Exactly two years ago, on November 28th 2005, I wrote:

I remember when I decided to change my display name to my full name on my profile and on Jordan Planet a little while after I started blogging. I felt it was an important decision, but it was also a bit impulsive… I just thought, to me blogging is some kind of self-edited journalism, and I want whatever I write to be associated with me, I want people to know that these are my thoughts and not some unknown person's! Later on, I sometimes caught myself subconsciously thinking twice about what I was writing… for multiple reasons related to my identity being revealed! I found this disturbing… but still, I never regret the decision! It does add a lot of responsibility, and that's a very valuable lesson to learn and exercise on a daily basis.

…. what I feel is that most of the red lines that restrict our expression come from within, rather than from external factors. We limit ourselves, more so when we're not hiding behind nick names and fake identities. It seems to me that there are always contradicting forces pulling us in opposing directions…

On June 19th 2006:

Here's another question… how much of yourself can you put "out there"? We've had the interesting debate of anonymity a while back, and JO magazine had a well-put little article about it in the June issue. Khalaf had struck a good note when he said "In real life I express the same thoughts that I blog quite freely. However, in real life I have the ability to judge what to say to whoever I am dealing with. In real life, my audience is not anonymous. On the internet, my readers are anonymous, and so am I."

Do I regret the choice of blogging under my real, full name? No, I don't, but I wonder if someday I will. Does it restrict what I blog about? You bet. If I could go back and start over would I change anything?

Well…




No :)




On September 25th, 2006:

You get to a point where you start questioning and over-thinking things. How free are we to write whatever we want? (I'm not talking in the political sense of freedom). Why do we confine ourselves within circles and red lines of our own creation? How much of ourselves can we put out there?



After a year and a half of blogging, have I created a certain character for this blog that I don't want to shift from? To what extent can I experiment? How personal can I go? Define 'personal'. Would I rather I was anonymous? What's in a name anyway? Hmmmm… this is Amman, Jordan though; a lot of baggage comes with a name, remember?


On June 8th, 2007:

I do write about things that I am passionate about, that interest me, or that I want to share. Yet there remains a lot more that I observe everyday, a lot more that stirs thoughts and opinions up there in my head that never find their way to publishing. "Why" is the question that I need to address; Have I turned out to be such a coward? Am I afraid of being misunderstood? Judged? Am I trying to preserve a certain image? Does it worry me if the ones dear to me realize that they don't quite know me? Does it worry me that I'm at a stage where I’m still formulating my stands and opinions? I do believe that writing is a process, not an ends in itself… so why have I stopped blogging??


When Shakespeare said "What's in a name?" he obviously had no idea what Jordan is like!!

A good friend of mine calls it "compartmentalizing our lives"… and I suppose she's right.


Ah… the journey…

None of this means that I will stop writing here. I love this blog. I have opinions and thoughts and little observations enough to keep two blogs going… whether I have time, well, that’s another question. But my latest insomniac habits might prove useful :)

On this note… I’m off… I have another blog to attend to.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Question Mark

I know the year is not over yet, but it’s December already, and this past week I’ve been thinking more than usual of all the good things in my life, and of the intense, rich, transformational, and surprising year that passed - with all the ups and downs, the sad moments and the happy moments. I feel blessed. May be I’ll write more about 2007 some time, may be I won’t… but for now I felt that “Question Mark” is one piece of music that somehow reflects my year.




This video was taken during Sign of Thyme’s concert early this week. I have no idea why I didn’t record until the end of the song. I also apologize for the poor quality of the recording but I didn’t have a proper video camera.


While I’m at it, here’s another song I love – “Arwa”; it’s similar to “Question Mark” in the buildup and the anticipation and the varying moods. I just love how intense this music is. (I also only recorded half of it!!)




Both pieces were composed by Yacoub Abu Ghosh.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

I'm Sad...

It was a while ago when I blogged about this story that made me angry. I wrote the happy follow-up a couple of weeks after but for some reason never got around to posting it.

Here is what I was going to publish, under the title “Rasha is my Hero”

Recap: Saba is a pretty girl in 8th grade (older than her classmates because she flunked a class and then missed another because she had some family issues). She got into one of those “phone relationships” with a slightly older boy who keeps hanging out around the school. Her brother – her half brother actually, who was living in another country for 18 years and who only became part of his mom’s family a year and a half ago, decided he would be the one with authority over his half sister, Saba. Three weeks ago, when he found out she’s talking to this boy, he told her that she will not be allowed to go to school anymore, and locked her up at home. Her friends tried to talk to him, other people tried to talk to him, but he wouldn’t yield. He said “No more school for Saba”.

Rasha:

Rasha is the loudest girl in class. She’s dynamic and funny, but could be annoying in that she doesn’t know how to listen and when in a group doesn’t know how to give other girls a chance. Teachers complain that she’s the source of noise and chaos, but they also seem to depend on her when they need help (because she volunteers first). She’s with the scouts, loves football (soccer), and complains that her mom doesn’t let her play in the street anymore.


After the third week of Saba’s absence from school, and after her close friends failed in changing her brother’s mind, Rasha went up to Saba’s house and started telling the authoritarian brother that his sister really is a good girl, and that he shouldn’t ruin her future by taking away her right to learn. She talked and talked and talked, addressing the 19-year-old as “3ammo” (which means, Uncle. Arabs call every older strange man “uncle”). I could imagine Rasha talking fast like she always does, with her pushy approach that wouldn’t take “No” for an answer. She concluded by saying “I’m going to come tomorrow morning to take her to school and I hope you won’t let me down”.

The next day, Rasha went to Saba’s place first thing in the morning, stood at the door, and said to her brother “I’m not moving unless Saba comes to school with me”.

And it worked. The brother called out to Saba, telling her to get dressed and ready for school.



That day when I saw Saba at school, we had a long heart-to-heart discussion after class, and she told me how her brother’s friend is interested in her and had told her brother he wants to propose to her. Her brother was completely for it, and she said that she actually liked the guy and was attracted to him.

What I said was, he might be a very good guy, you might be happy marrying him, but whatever you do… DO NOT LEAVE SCHOOL AT AGE 15 TO GET MARRIED!! I told her that while school might seem utterly useless, it’s the key to more choices for her future. I tried to get it into her 15-year-old mind that getting an education and learning skills helps you improve your life and change your reality. I said a lot of things, we talked for 45 minutes… she listened and responded and shared things, and then gave me a big hug and went back into class.

Later that evening she called me, and said that her mom wanted to talk to me. Her mom was brief and courteous and said that her daughter was telling her a lot about our Injaz class, and that she would like to meet me one of those days.

When I hung up I had a smile on my face and I was feeling positive.

Today…

I walked into class, and the first bit of news the girls gave me was:

Miss, guess what! Saba left school… it was her choice this time… she got engaged… she’s not coming back

Sunday, December 02, 2007

A Concert You Shouldn't Miss

Sign of Thyme and Friends are performing live in concert tonight...



Place: Terra Sancta Cultural Center in Luweibdeh
Time: 8:00 pm
Ticket: JD5, sold at the door

Most of the pieces will be from their second album "Zad", which was released in September, but the program will include some other surprises as well.

Along with the band's core line-up; Yacoub Abu Ghosh on Bass Guitar, Ahmad Barakat on Oud, and Nasser Salameh on Percussions.. tonight's show will include guest musicians Aziz Maraka on Piano, Nabih Boulos on Violin, and Yazan Roussan on Percussion.

From re-arrangements of great Arabic classics like Aziza and Longa Riyadh, to international jazz standards played with a Ammani flavor like Favorite Things and Autumn Leaves, to brilliant originals like Question Mark and Sab3a... tonight's show will be a wonderful and very rich musical experience. Don't miss it!